Every so often on the road I meet someone who really stands out from the crowd – for a variety of reasons.
Some of them are just amazingly nice people, some I share some epic adventures with and some are just massive idiots!
However during my first 6 weeks in Montainta, Ecuador I met one of these stand out people. A Belgian girl by the name of Aurelie who stands out for a completely different reason…simply put she’s a magnet for backpacker fails!
Now for the last few years it’s the lovely Lauren from Never Ending Footsteps that has been giving me my fix of backpacker fails – the poor girl has done everything from spill a margarita over her brand new Macbook Pro (which made me cry a lot inside as a massive Apple fanboy!) through to having someone actually DIE next to her on a slow boat to Laos.
The only unfortunate thing is though is I’ve been living these fails through her blog – I’ve never actually witnessed the chaos first hand (although I feel the pain of her long suffering partner Dave!) but Aurelie has changed all that!
Now I’ve had my own set of backpacker fails – like my 10 worst backpacker moments – but with Aurelie it seems to be a daily occurrence!
So in the interest of comedy for you, to commemorate her leaving this week and quite frankly for my own entertainment by publicly embarrassing her I bring you the Top 5 Backpacker Fails of Aurelie!
1) General Falling
I have witnessed Aurelie stack it onto the floor on numerous occasions over the last 6 weeks – which has quickly led her to gain the nickname Giraffe…it appears that the girl has little to no control over her limbs!
It’s not just involving obstacles though, it seems even flat ground and her own feet can challenge her on a daily basis!
I think one of my favourites was on the way down from a view point which she’d paced up and even offered Tank a piggy back down. No sooner had she offered her service when both feet slipped clean out from underneath her and she stacked it onto her ass in the dirt. Classy lady!
…she’s also the girl who managed to fall UP a ladder on our boat and scrape the hell out of knee.
Smooth Aurelie, smooth!
2) The Bikini Fail
After a long boat journey to Isla De La Plata the whole of our travel buddy group is waiting around by the beach for some members of our tour group to arrive and our guided walk of the island to begin.
Thats when Gijs mentions to Tank (aka Frankie, aka Hannah – long story!) that Aurelie should maybe adjust her bikini. As soon as Tank bursts into giggle Alex and myself clock whats going on – she’s stood there in front of the entire group with half her vagina totally exposed!
Once we finally tell her there’s an issue (through our fits of giggles!) it still takes her a couple moment to realise whats going on – followed by some rather flushed cheeks and a very embarrassed wardrobe adjustment!
3) The Suntanning Fail
When a pasty white European chick is exposed to the harsh sun of Ecuador there’s bound to be trouble. Some burn outright, some spend all days in doors or some are sensible enough to plaster themselves in sunscreen and be safe. Aurelie tried the latter approach but in true Aurelie fashion it didn’t quite go to plan.
In fact this is another where her seeming partner in crime Alex was also involved too. The girls had both spent the day on the beach studying Spanish and got pretty pink.
It wasn’t until the following morning through that it got pretty amusing! Alex emerged and we soon clocked the burn on her back – bright red except for the perfect outline of her bikini tie – complete with draping white line right down her back to her bum.
But Aurelie managed to top this – her stomach a patchwork of burn, smeared hand prints and pale white as she monumentally cocked up applying her sunscreen.
Play safe in the sun guys and girls!
Given all the above situations you would have thought it would be safer for Aurelie to stay away from extreme sports, let alone mix this with deep water – and you’d be correct!
Now I pride myself on being a surf coach and I enjoy a good challenge – but 3 weeks with Aurelie has still left me puzzled!
So far she’s managed to snap a fin, get caught in a rip current and nearly drown (not whilst I was teaching her may I add!) and every board she’s ridden seems to have broken within a day of her handing it back in some seemingly weird case of surfboard suicide!
…and don’t even get me started on the nose dives and wipeouts. Pure comedy gold!
5) The Dog Incident
This is my personal favourite of her backpacker fails mainly due to the fact I had my camera to hand and captured the whole thing. Picture the scene – we’re all chilling on the beach in Porto Lopez soaking up the sunset and having a chat. Along comes a HUGE stray dog…which immediately sends me scurrying as I HATE dogs…especially stray ones. Aurelie and our friend Alex are face down on the sand when the dog begins trying to mount Aurelie – not full on but in an even more hilarious slow motion kind of way. After 5 minutes he literally has the girls pinned on top of each other as he paws at Alexs boobs and tries to hump Aurelie.
And to finish it off? Well he decided to piss all over Aurelie to mark his territory! PRICELESS!
UPDATE; Within 4 hours of this post going live she managed to get smashed in the face by a volleyball…twice!
Have you had or witnessed any amusing backpacker fails whilst on the road? Feel free to share them!